Monthly Archives: February 2010

The thing about unemployment is…

Its just really really monotonous and boring.

When you have a job you think, hmmm…If I didn’t have this job I could do fun things like go to the Grandview (a Target outlet I’m obsessed with) at 9:00 in the morning to look at stuff and not buy it, or I could go out with my mom and sister as much as I wanted, or I could knock items off my to-do list that have been there for months, like cleaning my room or cleaning out the second bay of the garage.

but in reality all I’ve ended up doing is sit on the couch and watch trash tv and mitigate the disputes between the animals.

Its not at all like I thought it would be, but at the same time its much better than the stress and never-ending cycle of disappointment that was my job.

So for now, until something comes along, I’ll take the unemployment, I’ll take the animal fights and the long freelance assignments, but I have committed myself to accomplishing at least ten tasks per day, because its good to have a routine. Blogging was not on that list so I have already deviated from my plan for today, but I can deal with it.

I’m going to go get started on my plan so I can move on to the next thing…because it’ll be another six hours or so until someone comes home.

Holding down the fort,



Expect a barrage of posts for as long as I’m unemployed.

I feel really good today.

This doesn’t happen very often anymore but I feel great.

The lackluster weather forecast for the next few days doesn’t get me down, nerves about job searching can’t phase me, the fact that I’m home alone and there’s chocolate in the refrigerator calling my name (and its call will not be answered because I have already worked out today) will not do anything to harm my great mood.

Want to know why?

Because I went out with my Bestest Buddy Ever the K, my sister, and my mom yesterday and I bought stuff for the wedding (including the runner for the head table, and long strands of ribbon to go on the other tables, its going to look good once we get it all finished). We had fun girl times and I really needed that.

This morning I woke up and went out to the couch where The Man was sitting and we watched The Sopranos (quickly becoming our favorite show) and I fell asleep during the Sopranos, I made a light breakfast for us and then we decided it would be a good idea to go have lunch together. He took me through Subway because I’m trying to eat better and then took himself through Taco Bell and we drove out to one of our favorite places and ate and then drove out to Grayson Lake and took a walk around the frozen outside of the lake. It was really nice, it did not involve dinner reservations and it was just wonderful.

I’m looking forward to more fun times with the K and my sister tonight, we’re headed out for some Southwestern Food and then to see The Wolfman. I’m so excited for more girl time!

I’m going to go cross items off my to do list and get ready for this evening. I’ll see you all on McFatty Monday!

Reflections on my first full day of unemployment.

*drums fingers on the desk*…is anyone hiring?

I am not meant to be a sedentary person. I used to be a runner, and I’m getting back in to being a jogger, if not just a really fast walker (runner will come). I’ve always been a go-go-go motivated person and this…sucks.

I went to the gym, worked on my freelance writing, went out to a store with my sister and her roommate, fed the cat, let the dogs in, let the dogs out, texted my mom to ask if she would bring home dinner, watched the latest episode of Grey’s on Hulu, cleaned up my bedroom and set up my home office (its very nice, pictures will come).

…but I don’t think I’m meant to be unemployed. I think I’m meant to be working–at the very least working part time–and getting out of the house to do something. I had two good interviews last week and I’ll have two responses next week so please keep me in your prayers.

In the meantime I’m off to party with the K, my sister, and my mother…we’re going to a wedding outlet because the wedding is creeping up on me faster than I’d like it to.

Everyone have a wonderful saturday and let me know if anything is hiring.


I’m not freelancing full time, but its my full time income.

…I get distracted easily.

Right now I’m supposed to be freelancing but I’m having trouble concentrating on that so I decided to move over to blogging. Quite a few bloggers are freelancers on the side because freelancing pays a little bit and its nice to use your writing talents for something isn’t it?

I freelance write and translate (mostly tech speak) through, I highly recommend it if you are a business professional and need some extra income or if you are just looking to get started as a freelance writer. I’ve enjoyed working through Elance and I have secured my first client and nearly completed my first job. I’m pretty darn excited to be doing this job too.

I quit the Nowhere News a week ago so I appreciate this extra income, even though it is very limited. I have a small home office set up in the corner of my bedroom and I am just plugging away at articles this morning. It feels so strange to be home by myself during the day, I feel like I’ll be quite productive. Pandora radio helps with this.

I went to the gym this morning, on my never-ending quest to not be fat. I had fallen off the wagon when I pushed my wedding back to August. It was nice to be in there this morning and I feel like I accomplished some work. My mom and I are going this evening so I’m excited about that. I’m also taking a trip tomorrow with Mom, Mary, and the K to a giant wedding outlet about an hour from here. I’m so excited for travels and excitement.

I realize I have said excited probably a million times in this article, but excitement is my life right now, waiting on a new job, a new lowered stress level and a wedding in a few months.

Well, back to freelancing or possibly some lunch, its been a long morning already.


I’m sorry.

I know it doesn’t change anything now…but I’m sorry I made fun of you.

I was driving through the big town today and saw the billboard they put up for you…well, both of them. You graduated from one of the top colleges in the state and you’re a Rhodes Scholar.


I’m sorry I was such a rude kid to you when we were in high school. I’m sorry I mocked you mercilessly behind your back at all of our tournaments. I’m sorry I called you fat, ugly, said no one would ever date you, laced my fingers through the fingers of whomever I was dating at the time and stuck my tongue out at your back as you walked in front of me down the halls of schools when we were together. I’m sorry I repeated your name in high pitched mocking tones when they announced you’d won something…I know you were a nice person and you didn’t do the same to me. You recommended books for me, you talked about the required reading for that year’s tournament, you invited me to bunk with you at camps I never went to because I was too busy.

You liked me.

I mocked you.

You wouldn’t recognize me now, I graduated and went to Bible College because I believed for some reason that I was supposed to. I went from being a runner to an obese, sick, college graduate working at a newspaper. My brain, the thing that made us competitors, enemies turned against me and I swing violently from one extreme to the next these days. Yeah, I graduated college in three years but I couldn’t tell you the thematic elements of Madame Bovary , I couldn’t tell you much about the art we loved back then these days. No one will put two billboards up about me in town, no one from our old competitions remembers much about me…

I chose a different life, I chose stagecraft rather than literary criticism, I chose The Man rather than world travel, I always believed in the back of my mind that I was inferior to you, when I managed to beat you out for first place I celebrated too much, thought too much of myself, said I was the best, you must have been having an off day.

We’re adults now, you’re going to go on your Rhodes Scholar trip abroad and I’m headed to graduate school next fall. Maybe we’ll choose the same school? Maybe I’ll pass you in the hallway and stop you, say we competed against one another and you were nice to me, apologize for old wounds…

Maybe you’ll do the same things to me I did to you…

and maybe I’ll deserve it.

McFatty Monday Week Five

Oh my.

Its week five already and I realized I only have thirteen weeks until my wedding.

After I realized this I declared all out war on the fat that is sticking to my stomach, thighs, and butt (and my super jiggly arms that i like to keep hidden but refuse to buy a lacy thing to put over my already freaking gorgeous wedding dress.

Did I tell you I got my wedding dress?

Yes, I did. I can’t post it here because the man reads this but it is nice!!! Its not coming in until April which kind of worries me but then I remember that APRIL IS TWO MONTHS AWAY. GAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!!!!

This is supposed to be about my fat, not my panicking.

Anyway…the fat front.

I’ve avoided the scale like the plague this week since I know I messed up this weekend. I had a cheat meal that turned in to a cheat weekend and I worked my rear end off last night to get rid of that. Mom and I exercised without stopping for 45 minutes, and thats as long as we’ve managed to go so far. I was pretty dang excited. I haven’t looked at the scale so far today, mostly because I was in an awful hurry this morning and two because I know I won’t really like what I see. My numbers aren’t reflecting my progress, which is a problem everyone else has, I know. I just get frustrated easily…thats why I’m up to 230 pounds on my five foot four frame.

On the exercise front I purchased and did 30 Day Shred by Jillian Michaels.



Misery, absolute misery.

But I’m doing it again tonight since I’m a glutton for punishment, and every day until March 2, which will be my thirty days. Expect me to be very sexy, but very whiny when this finishes. They promise that it will get better and by day 5 or so and I won’t be walking around screaming like a little child every time I move my legs.

I’m not being dramatic, it was that bad.

Whew. Awful…but I’m actually looking forward to it tonight. I know, I’m completely nuts.

Completely nuts about not being fat anymore that is.

My healthy goals for this week:
-Research a meal plan that Mom and I can follow and actually eat food. This means no Special K Challenge, no Slim Fast, and probably no Home Delivery meal systems. This will be the test of how well I actually understand nutrition.
-Exercise 5 times this week for 20 minutes or more.
-I’ve lost ten pounds, which puts me in the 230 range, officially not my highest weight ever, but I’ve been in this territory before for about two weeks…so I think its time to start hardcore training for Cto5k (thats Couch to 5K for those unfamiliar) since my race is in…TWELVE WEEKS! The program is nine weeks so that should be good.

For those of you who don’t know I’m running the Susan G. Komen for the Cure 5K in Charleston West Virginia on May 1. My mom and sister are walking the race and I’m running the race, which should be a lot of fun…if I can train enough, I may end up walking the race…which I still think would be a nice milestone, to go from being 245 to walking a 5k.

We’ll see what happens, I’m not going to make any wild speculation right now considering I only walked twenty minutes on the treadmill last night. However, I’m ready to start week one of C25K and the next time you see me I’ll be on week two!

Peace out Fatties.