Monthly Archives: January 2012

Wifedom.

I have been a wife for almost 17 months now.

Before I was a wife, back when I was a girlfriend and later a fiancee I was terrified of the transition. I was terrified I would be awful at being a wife, that my husband and his family, and my family would grow to resent me because I would burn dinner and ruin laundry and while doing these things dust would settle on some things in my house.

I worry too much.

I pretty much enjoy everything about being a wife. My favorite part, I’ll be honest (other than things we shouldn’t discuss here) has to be cooking.

Really, I have always enjoyed cooking. When my sister and I grew tall enough to reach the stove we learned we either needed to cook or risk salmonella by eating raw meat. I’m not saying my mom wasn’t there enough, or that she couldn’t cook she was just a really busy lady and we wanted to help her out.

I started off small with things like eggs (isn’t that the first thing everyone learns to cook?) and could make a great Brinner by the age of 12. I moved on to spaghetti, and various casseroles until I hit my early signature dish: Lemon pepper chicken. This was a delicious mixture of chicken thighs with crispy skin coated in oil and lemon juice with a dusting of paprika and basil. It was freaking delicious. I still make it today. I haven’t made it in a while, maybe I need to get on that. There’s a whole chicken sitting in my freezer.

As time went on my recipes got better and better. I learned to cook things that family members liked: Sunshine Eggs (Yankees call them Eggs in a Basket) for my grandfather, chicken salad for my dad, Corn Sticks also for my dad (corn bread but in stick form), Skillet Vegetables (also for my dad) Chili (I spoiled my dad with food. Looking back I’m glad I did) Southwestern Chicken (for my sister) Chicken Stew (who doesn’t love that) Salmon Patties (for my mom).

None of it was gourmet but it was delicious.

When I met Brian he came from a family of people who actually followed recipes. He brought cookbooks in to our marriage and we decided that we really loved cooking and cooking for each other. With the advent of sites like All Recipes and Pinterest I’ve tried out more new recipes in the last little bit than in my entire life. And I’m loving it.

My favorite thing in the world is when a friend comes to my house and mentions they’re hungry. I tend to seek out people to feed and I make enough food to feed an army. This is probably why I’m also working on weight loss. My dad visited my house in November of 2010 and the first thing he did was crack open the refrigerator and ask what delicious things I’d been cooking. It made, and still makes me feel awesome. And then he made himself a turkey sandwich. Weirdo.

I love to cook. Lately I love to cook healthy, whole foods. And when we move at the end of this month I’ll be moving to a big kitchen with plenty of space for new creations. I’m excited to see what I come up with.

Come eat with me friends.

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“Just because I’m losing, doesn’t mean I’m lost.”

I tweeted those lyrics last night from my seat way up in the cheap seats at church. I love Coldplay, I love all three versions of that song (Lost) and last night I REALLY needed to hear those words.

I am losing right now…in more ways than one.

Lets focus on the positive shall we.

I am losing weight. I completely overhauled my diet. I ate meat only three times last week and the meat I ate was fish. I ate fruits and vegetables for most of my meals. I drank water and I exercised multiple times last week. Brian bought me a mini trampoline which is a great way to get in exercise. I can’t really do much bouncing on it because I may go through the floor but its great to do jumping jacks on, to march in place, to do oblique twists and let me tell you exercising on that thing is HARD. The first time I did it I could only go ten minutes and I had sweat pouring off of me. Low impact doesn’t necessarily mean easy. For additional exercise I have taken to walking my wild beasts around the neighborhood. We have a short 20 minute walk we do that burns about 100 calories and then another longer walk that burns closer to 200. They seem to be enjoying it, I’m really enjoying the exercise and the fresh air and the non freezing temperatures have really been helping with that.

I stepped on the scale last Saturday morning to find I had lost 6 pounds in only 5 days of tracking. I understand that its probably mostly water weight…but to be completely honest with you all that’s the longest I’ve gone in a long time without giving up on a diet. I’m still going strong and cooking healthy (and according to my husband delicious) meals for us. We’re not eating out and we’re spending a lot of time at home packing up for our big move. I feel like a winner for the first time in a long time.

Okay, here’s the negative part.

I got my LSAT scores back last week. It would be an understatement to say I F*&^ -ed it up. Oh boy did I ever do horribly on that test. I want to vomit every time I think about it for longer than 5 minutes…so I haven’t been. I went out the next night and bought another prep book and registered for the test in February. Law school may have to wait another semester while I bring my score up…but if I’ve learned one thing in my life its this. If you f*&% something up move on.

I had a deep soul searching conversation with myself about whether I did in fact want to be a lawyer after this great f&^% up of 2011. I decided that yes, I do want to be a lawyer and I need to work harder at this goal. When I studied for the LSAT last time I took a few practice tests and convinced myself I wasn’t going to get a good score and gave up.

and look what happened. That’s what people call a “self-fulfilling prophecy” children.

I did a few practice problems this evening and as I was checking over the answers I realized that I could have gotten a perfect on these answers if I had trusted the answer I came up with in the first place. For some reason I thought the answer I had originally come up with had to be wrong and the right answer was somewhere else.

I do this a lot in my life. What I do and what I come up with are never good enough.

I was really proud of myself for finishing my bachelor’s degree in three years. I was over the moon happy that I did something that takes people 4 years or longer in less time. After I graduated and was working at the Nowhere News I was sitting in a job interview with another place and the lady asked about my time management skills and I said “Well, I graduated college in three years.” and she said “So what, I graduated college in one and a half years while taking care of my terminally ill mother and taking care of three kids.” Instead of thinking, as I should have: “Wow, this woman is a bitch and she’s just trying to one up me” I immediately shut up about it. Since then I have never talked to anyone I didn’t know about graduating college in three years. I rarely ever mention it now.

Basically what I’m saying is I need to grow some self-confidence and believe that I have achieved great things and I will continue to achieve great things in my life. I have about 4 weeks before I take the LSAT again. Can you grow self confidence in 4 weeks? I’m sure going to try…along with taking a bunch more practice tests and studying my brains out. Hey I only work 3 days a week.

So if you’re looking for me in the next 4 weeks I’ll either be cooking healthy food, exercising, or studying.

Am I back in college again?

Well yes I am…but more on that development later.

2011 is over.

Can I get an Amen?

Geez. Worst year ever.

I mean aside from the obvious…I buried my father, lost a good dog, lost a few friends (notice the dog ranks higher than the friends. suckers!) and endured various other hardships less important than those I spent most of 2011 in a job that made me hate myself until I found my current job

and to top it all off I stepped on the scale this morning to found out I gained 10 pounds.

F you 2011!!!! I for one will not miss you.

I also woke up with a pretty intense cold yesterday (I blame my boss) I feel like its 2011 saying F you too Liz!

So I start 2012 with a few hefty goals. Here they are:

• I will lose 70 pounds. Ponder that I have come to a place in my life wherein I have 70 (and probably more) pounds to lose. I would like to ideally lose this weight by Brian’s cousins fancy New York wedding in July. That’s a hefty goal. 70 pounds in 7 months. A lesser person would say it was unattainable. It’s not. When I break it down its 2.5 pounds a week and 10 pounds a month. Surely my lard ass can accomplish that. It will take hard work. It will involve going from being basically sedentary to exercising daily, if not multiple times a day. It will involve clean eating (I’m going back to raw foods). It will take discipline…and I have not been a very disciplined person lately, its time for that to change.

• I will apply to law school. And be accepted. I added “and become a lawyer” to that…but it won’t happen in 2012. Its okay, its nice to have long term goals.

• I will research and implement more methods of frugal, sustainable living. We’ve lived beyond our means for too long. Its time to change that.

• I will dedicate more of my time to volunteer work.

• I will finish my novel. Yes, the novel I lost when we changed computers. All 200+ pages of it… I’m about 15 pages back in to it, and I need to finish it before law school eats my life. Also I tend to not eat while writing (anyone else do that?) so that helps with goal #1

• I will devote more time to working on my marriage. Its a work in progress.

• I will work hard with my dogs to make them good citizens. I would like for them to be therapy dogs in the future, its a little dream of mine. They’re a little wild right now but they’re so sweet and loving that I think they’d make good therapy dogs. That’s another long term goal. For 2012 I’d like to be able to take them to the farmer’s market without Mommy’s arms being torn out of their sockets.

• I will decorate and make my new house a loving place. (We’re moving at the end of January) Its a 2BR so I have a spare room for everyone to come and crash. But only one bathroom so we may have to make a schedule.

• I will chill out on collecting dishes and work to become a legit antique dealer. I love antiques (history major) and the number of Fiesta dishes (both vintage and current) that I have is a little embarrassing. Never mind most of these have been picked up at thrift stores. You know what. Forget this goal. I like dishes and I will continue to get them…but I will also become a legit antique dealer, you know, as a hobby.

• I will attend church more often and grow in my faith. Perhaps even a Sunday School class. This is something my husband and I both need to work on.

I think that’s it. As I read through this list I am slightly intimidated by what I’ve put down on paper — or in blog. But you know what…I’m a strong person. I don’t give myself enough credit for how tough I actually am. Its time to change all that.

Anyone have any goals they want to share?